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Have a Disgusted Look at Larry the Cable Guy's 'Jingle All the Way' Sequel

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Taking a cue from the woefully Rock-less Tooth Fairy 2, the Schwarzenegger-free Jingle All the Way 2 fills the noticeable void of muscle mass with affected redneck quirks and Prilosec. The spiritual sequel to the 1996 comedy casts a new lead in Larry the Cable Guy, who here, as he has for most of his adult life, plays a bumpkin named "Larry." Keeping with the general idea of the original, the premise involves "Larry" trying to get the year's hot, sold-out toy for his daughter--but the stakes have been raises, because his girl's new stepfather is also trying to win her heart through consumerism. These slapstick antics could, years later, determine who walks her down the aisle, and whether or not that person is wearing sleeves.

Here's the straight-to-video film's first teaser, in which you will see none of that plot but will see Larry the Cable Guy's trailer's Christmas light display--replete with the expected gag about having an unsafe number of plugs in a single outlet. Ha ha, Larry only understands wiring as it pertains to cable installation!

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Ricky Gervais Loosely Remaking French Comedy with Eric Bana

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Though it's Liam Neeson who's been pushing Ricky Gervais to get him into comedy, it's Eric Bana who Gervais will instead guide from self-serious action to laughter. Bana is reportedly attached to return to his early comedy roots in Gervais's loose remake of Special Correspondents, a 2009 French satire by Frédéric Auburtin. The original dealt with a duo of journalists faking their own kidnapping in Iraq, but Gervais's rewrite keeps only the general premise of media deception; now Bana will play "an arrogant, struggling New York-based radio journalist who fakes frontline war reports from a Spanish restaurant in Manhattan as a desperate ploy to save his job." Tapas: the source of journalistic corruption, and the reason we're never as full as we thought we'd be even though we ordered a lot.

HBO Gives 'Hello Ladies' a Movie Finale, in Case You Wanted That

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Despite low ratings and a general understanding that it's inferior to any other Stephen Merchant-created show you could watch, Hello Ladies is being sent off with a special movie event. HBO has officially announced that the canceled series will return next month to wrap up all those loose ends about whether or not Merchant is gangling and awkward around women. The 80-minute film is described thusly:

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'Wonder Woman' Film To Fly Her Invisible Plane to the Roaring Twenties

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Wonder Woman will apparently be the Captain America of the DC Universe--and not just in being most likely to wear patriotic briefs. According to Bleeding Cool, Wonder Woman's 2017 solo debut will, like Captain America first outing, begin in the first half of the 20th century.

Their sources say the film starts on the women-only Paradise Island, where the various factions of Amazons are warring for power. Then, in a plot point that will certainly not be contentious in today's environment, a man shows up and Wonder Woman decides to take off with him rather than deal with all this drama. Finally, in the latter half of the film they get back to normal civilization, and it's revealed that it's been the 1920s the whole time. Reportedly, "the film will then show Diana exploring that world - a world where women have only just got the vote - from her... unique perspective." Because if there's one Wonder Woman foe fans have long been dying to see on screen, it's culture shock over the Nineteenth Amendment.

You Officially Have To Take Off Your Stupid Google Glass at the Movies

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Google Glass has joined our crippling agoraphobia and our sack of fries as something we'll have to sort of hide if we want to get in a movie theater. The reason: on Wednesday, the MPAA placed a ban on Glass or any other wearable technology that could be used to bootleg or cheat on the pre-movie trivia.

The question of legality already came up earlier this year when a man wearing Google Glass during a screening of Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit was later questioned by the FBI and Department of Homeland Security, as their priority is defending Chris Pine films, no matter how lukewarm the reception. But now the MPAA and National Association of Theatre Owners have made official a "a zero-tolerance policy" on the devices, boldly cautioning, "Individuals who fail or refuse to put the recording devices away may be asked to leave." And then where would we go with our fry sack?

Secretary of Robots Michael Bay To Finally Make Response to Benghazi Attack

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Michael Bay's latest piece of tone-deaf jingoism may return to him to Northern Africa, the war-torn region he knows best as where there was a bad-guy robot with testicles. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the Pearl Harbor historian is in talks to put a bunch of totally sweet, slick military action sequences in an adaptation of 13 Hours, Mitchell Zuckoff's book about the September 11, 2012 attack on an American compound in Benghazi. It was a tragic event that resulted in the deaths of U.S. Ambassador J. Christopher Stevens, U.S. Foreign Service Information Management Officer Sean Smith, and two CIA contractors who died at a second nearby attack site. But perhaps now they can all rest in peace, knowing they will be remembered in a slow-mo sequence where the hot girl weeps for them before the camera tilts up to the American flag--tattered but still flying strong, and still in slow motion.

Seth Rogen To Play Wozniak to Christian Bale's Jobs

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In an unexpected, odd pairing of rich-guy superheroes, Seth Rogen will star alongside Christian Bale in Danny Boyle's Steve Jobs biopic. Bale was rumored to be taking the lead role two weeks ago, and now, according to Variety, Rogen has signed on to his frequent role as chubbier sidekick to play Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak. Aaron Sorkin wrote the film's script, said to be composed of three long scenes that will make Rogen constantly wonder if they're actually that long or just feel really long, you know?

Pee-wee Herman Movie Shooting in February

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A third Pee-wee Herman movie, that oft-spoken of but never materialized film that has become as mythical as the Alamo's basement, is supposedly finally going to shoot early next year. That's the word from Paul Reubens himself, who last night appeared on The Tonight Show and told Jimmy Fallon that they'd hired a director and this February would begin production on Pee-wee's latest, yet-unsized adventure. Judd Apatow is, as previously rumored, producing the film, but other details--like who exactly this director is--apparently won't be revealed until next month. Reubens explained that he's not yet allowed to give away more, saying, "I was hoping I could make this huge announcement tonight, but it's a week away, I think, from being announced." And here I thought he was a rebel.

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