Reese Witherspoon Will Continue Making Outmoded Reese Witherspoon Romantic-Comedies

August 8, 2012

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Already attached to star in a belated adaptation of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, Reese Witherspoon will continue her mission of furthering every romantic-comedy conceit we neglected in the mid-'90s with a lead role in The Beard, a movie Chernin Entertainment is planning as a way to seemingly expand the namesake Seinfeld episode into a feature length.

The Hollywood Reporter has few details on the project, but it's confirmed that Witherspoon will star and that the title refers to the UrbanDictionary definition of the term, with the film focusing on a woman (presumably Witherspoon) serving as a fake girlfriend to a gay guy. If Elaine Benes, or Jennifer Aniston in Object of My Affection, are any indication of the direction of this tale, Witherspoon most likely ends up falling for the guy and trying to un-gay him, teaching us all an important lesson about sexual orientation and playing out the nation's gay marriage debate via a wacky setpiece involving the disruption of an all-male wedding. And then maybe someone will make a Chick-fil-A joke.

Assuming Witherspoon's post-Oscar career continues at this trajectory, expect an online dating comedy soon.

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