'Centipede', 'Missile Command' Planned as Almost Certainly Terrible Films

May 13, 2016

pixels-centipede.jpg

Good news, retro gaming fans: The beautifully simplistic pleasures of classic Atari games will soon be complicated with an interminable plot! According to Deadline, beloved '80s hits Centipede and Missile Command will be resurrected in a form somehow even less desirable than Adam Sandler's Pixels, Atari teaming with Emmett/Furla/Oasis Films to produce two individual films about shooting some crude, faintly recognizable enemies. At last, we'll have a definitive answer as to whether those things the centipede was skittering around were, like, mushrooms, or what. And, wait, Wikipedia is telling me the thing you controlled in Centipede was a "somewhat humanoid head"? That is so specifically vague. Why wasn't it fully humanoid? What was shooting, then, if that wasn't a shrunk-down little ship like everyone logically assumed? Have I just suddenly grown interested in this just to see how it's possibly interpreted?

There is no mention of this project being in any way related to Human Centipede, which seems like a real missed opportunity, right?

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