David Goyer to Help Hollywood Suck Its Own Ass

June 14, 2007

marisamiller.jpg
If I was invisible, I would live in Marisa Miller's bathtub.

David Goyer has signed on to write and direct a new version of The Invisible Man. Hollywood has made a version of this movie how many times now? Just look how many entries there are for it on IMDB, and that doesn't even include Memoirs of an Invisible Man or Hollow Man or the countless pornos where an invisible man lives in the girls' locker room masturbating (okay that last one may have just been a fantasy of mine).

Honestly though, in five or ten years there's just going to be like three f***ing movies that they remake over and over and over again. And I know a bunch of you dorks out there are going to be whining "None of the other movie versions have been any good, if they stick to the original story it could be awesome, blah blah blah..." Well I'm here to tell you that it's going to suck. It's a stupid idea to make another one. This version won't be any better than any of the others, there's no Santa Clause and you're just going to rot after you die. Now leave me alone, Daddy has a hangover.

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