'One Missed Call' Is One of the Worst Movies Ever

January 11, 2008

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Many, many, many terrible movies come out each year--some even go on to make over $200 million and earn a sequel with "the girls"--but few reach the ultimate shit pinnacle of a 0% rating on RottenTomatoes.com. It's the film review world's equivalent to every student in your school refusing to sign your yearbook--there is simply nothing positive to be said about you, and no one cares if you ever change or have a gr8 summer.

Yet, somehow, (probably through its bland, derivative concept and awful execution) One Missed Call, the story of people receiving voicemails that play their final moments of life (then they die a few days later), has managed to receive absolutely no praise in any of its 52 aggregated reviews. It's an anti-honor that has been given to only a select, severely detestable group: Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever, Roberto Benigni's Pinocchio, King's Ransom, Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2, National Lampoon's Gold Digges, and Crossover. It's a feat, to say the least.

Let's just hope this doesn't deter any future movie-makers from delving into the fertile territory of the modern-technology-that-forecasts-brutal-death genre. Don't give up yet; we haven't even gotten to the point of a two-way-centric version (Beep. Talk. Die.?) If we advance to the level of holograms but don't make a movie about holograms murdering us, all of this technology is virtually impotent.

Also, does anyone want to see this with me this weekend?

One Missed Call Reviews [Rotten Tomatoes]

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