Exclusive New Theaters for Rich Turds!

March 26, 2008


Movie theaters have long been one of the few places in America where people of all ages and backgrounds, regardless of their social or economic standing, can meet to partake in a communal experience. So it's about time someone fixed that.

Australian conglomerate Village Roadshow has begun a 5-year, $200 million venture to create a line of swanky, upper-class cinemas that boast "plush reserved seating, special parking privileges and upscale food and beverage offerings with seat-side waiter service," (no exclusive water fountains?) plus "a 40-seat-maximum patron capacity and an even higher-end atmosphere [than existing deluxe theaters]". But, of course, such luxurious amenities come at a price: an inflated $35-a-ticket price tag, just high enough to keep out the hoi polloi.

If you want to be one of the first affluent assholes to find their movie experience disturbed exclusively by iPhones, it sounds like the first Gold Class Cinema will be heading to the Chicago area.

Read More: movie, news, theater
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