'Hellboy' Heats Up Weekend, Because Hell is Typically Depicted as Very Hot

July 14, 2008

hellboy-vs-winters.jpg

Weekend box office numbers!

1. Hellboy II: The Golden Army - $35.9 million, beating the first film's opening by over 12 million despite not using any of my brilliant advertising strategies.

2. Hancock - $33 million, but it could have been so much more if only "Big Willy" had made a bland rap for this one. Is he done with that?

3. Journey to the Center of the Earth 3D - $20.6 million, surely missing the top spot due to its bigoted, cyclops-excluding marketing campaign. One should not need binocular vision to enjoy a film.

4. Wall-E - $18.5 million. Has the summer's cute robot bubble burst???

5. Wanted - $11.6 million. Wait a minute.... where's Eddie Murphy Alien inside Eddie Murphy Ship?

Oh...

7. Meet Dave - $5.3 million. Yeah, that's right. Eff you, Meet Dave.

Weekend Box Office [Box Office Mojo]

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