'My Bloody Valentine 3D' Must Be Scary to Make Audiences React That Way!

October 23, 2008


What the hell happened, My Bloody Valentine 3D? Your first poster was clean (besides the blood), minimalist, well-designed, and kind of creepy. What is this, selling it like a Universal Studios ride? You can't even tell it's a horror movie. With the generic three-dimensional font and prominent pick axe, this could just as easily be an IMAX documentary about the excitement of mining.

All this poster says to me is, "Look, we aren't going to make any claims about the quality or content of this movie. However, we can promise that things definitely appear to emerge from the screen, and if you're lucky, in some cases there might be a girl in a low-cut shirt in the audience that you can surreptitiously check out while she's distracted by the weapon headed towards her idiot boyfriend's crotch." Even at my most desperate, I'd at least need to know there would definitely be a low-cut shirt girl in the audience before heading out.

Quiz: Can YOU spot Tom Cruise amongst the frightened audience members?

My Bloody Valentine 3D Poster [IMPA]

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