Jessica Biel Starring in New Comedy About Couple Having Regular Sex

October 29, 2009

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According to the Hollywood Reporter, Jessica Biel is attached to star in a new comedy in which--get this!--she agrees to have sex with her fiancé EVERY DAY (until their wedding)! CRAZY:

The actress is attached to star in and produce rookie screenwriter Julia Brownell's original screenplay "F***ing Engaged," a raunchy comedy about a couple who make a pact to have sex every day leading to their wedding so they don't turn into their crusty old parents.

Yeah, sex every day until your wedding! That will stop you from becoming your crusty old parents! I'm not sure how that will work, since after marriage is typically when the sex would taper off, turning you into your crusty old parents, but whatever. I'm sure it will work out.

Is this writer's entire notion of human sexuality derived from episodes of Married with Children and Everybody Loves Raymond? A young couple having daily sex isn't really that absurd of a concept, is it? Unless we're talking about the lady enjoying it too, am I right, dudes?! 'Cause ladies are all frigid and stuff! We're all like, "Give me the intercourse," and they're like, "Nuh-uh! I hate sex, Raymond!"

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