'Red Riding' Being Remade, Just in Time

October 15, 2009


Red Riding, a British adaptation of David Peace's Red Riding Quartet, aired on Channel 4 as a three-part miniseries in March. That was like seven months ago, though--that shit is old!--and, even more offensive, it stars Britons! Yuck! Who wants to see them!? Their voices are slightly different than mine!

Luckily, Columbia Pictures understands the need for recent British works to be immediately, senselessly remade with marketable American stars I'll recognize, so they're doing just that:

Columbia Pictures has acquired rights to remake the U.K. miniseries "Red Riding," and is negotiating with Steve Zaillian to write the script and Ridley Scott to direct.

The miniseries is a study of power and police corruption framed around the investigation of the disappearance of several young girls. For the pic, the setting will be transferred from Britain to the U.S. The mini clocked in at more than five hours, so Zaillian and Scott have their work cut out for them to compress it into one film.

Hey, that sounds like it would be a pretty good movie if it were to take place in locations I can more easily locate on a map! But, ugh, Ridley Scott is directing? I'm not sure he's quite right for the project. He just seems so... you know. Can't we get a Bay in here for this? Each frame of his films are like American flags waving their explosions with national pride.

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