Story of Moses Being Made Totally Extreme

October 12, 2009

moses-ten-commandments.jpg

Perhaps you've heard the story of Moses in the Bible, or in Cecil B. DeMille's 1956 film The Ten Commandments. And if you have, then you know those are totally boring, made by old fogies, and completely irrelevant to this generation's youth. Where's the awesome Moses story that's inaccurate to the point of blasphemy, where he's this bad-ass who cuts the Pharaoh's head off with a beam katana and gets the Hebrews out of there on skateboards?

Oh, here it is:

Twentieth Century Fox will develop a retelling of the story of Moses, from his near death as an infant to his adoption into the Egyptian royal family, his defiance of the Pharaoh and deliverance of the Hebrews from enslavement.

The script will be written by Adam Cooper and Bill Collage, who recently completed a scripted retelling of Herman Melville's "Moby Dick" for director Timur Bekmambetov at Universal.

"Moby Dick" was pitched as a "300"-like reimagining of the Melville story as a visually stunning action piece, and the story of Moses is conceived similarly.

The goal is to give a "Braveheart" feel to a story most famously captured in Cecil B. DeMille's 1956 film "The Ten Commandments."

I can see it already: "You see these ten commandments? I'll have broken every fucking one of them when I'm done with you, Terminator!" (Moses is about to fight a Terminator at this point in the script.)

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