'Spider-Man 4' Falls Apart

January 12, 2010


Your familiar Spider-Man movie setup of Sam Raimi instructing Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst, "KISS HARDER AND MORE UPSIDE-DOWN!" is no more. Following reported script disputes between Raimi and the studio, Deadline Hollywood claims everyone's just decided to give up on this whole effing thing and start over: Raimi and the cast are out, and the studio is reportedly sending whoever the new Peter Parker is back to high school. (Columbia and Marvel have since confirmed in a statement that they'll be moving forward with a script by James Vanderbilt.)

Come on, even Joel Schumacher got to make a couple horrible superhero movies before someone finally said, "OK, that's enough horrible superhero movies." After how fun Spider-Man 2 was, we shouldn't make Raimi & Friends go out on the low note of Spider-Man 3. Can't we at least let Raimi direct a five-minute intro to the new film that ends with Tobey Maguire rubbing his chin saying, "I was just remembering some other things I did when I was Spider-Man in high school..."? That way, if this reboot doesn't work out, at least we could start back in the fifth film with Peter Parker coming back from his remembered daydream, and we'll pretend Spider-Man 4 was just a stupid Family Guy-style aside.

(Thanks to Brian and everyone else who sent this in.)

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