Step one: admit to the atrocities committed.
"When I saw the second movie, I wasn't impressed with what we did. There were some really wild stunts in it, but the heart was gone.
We got lost. We tried to get bigger. It's what happens to sequels. It's like, how do you top the first one? You've got to go bigger. Mike went so big that it became too big, and I think you lost the anchor of the movie. ... You lost a bit of the relationships. Unless you have those relationships, then the movie doesn't matter. Then it's just a bunch of robots fighting each other.
Wait, he's only finding fault in the Transformers sequel? That's like McDonald's only apologizing for your second bite of a Filet-O-Fish--as if that first tentative nibble at the hard corner without cheese was any better. But still, at least this is a step towards healing (until Transformers 3 tears off that scab).
I feel like I dropped the ball on the legacy that people loved and cherished. You get to monkey-swinging and things like that and you can blame it on the writer and you can blame it on Steven [Spielberg, who directed]. But the actor's job is to make it come alive and make it work, and I couldn't do it. So that's my fault. Simple.
We [Harrison Ford and LaBeouf] had major discussions. He wasn't happy with it either. Look, the movie could have been updated. There was a reason it wasn't universally accepted.
I'll probably get a call [from Spielberg]. But he needs to hear this. I love him. I love Steven. I have a relationship with Steven that supersedes our business work. And believe me, I talk to him often enough to know that I'm not out of line. And I would never disrespect the man. I think he's a genius, and he's given me my whole life. He's done so much great work that there's no need for him to feel vulnerable about one film. But when you drop the ball you drop the ball.
Wow, did Shia LaBeouf just take all the blame for one of the worst scenes in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and then conduct a spontaneous, via-interview Indiana Jones intervention on Steven Spielberg? Well then, Shia, I guess that makes us... Even Stevens. (APPLAUSE)