Print this out and use a thick red marker to circle which film you'll be seeing, so it will "read" for the audience.
Director: Todd Phillips
Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Zach Galfianakis, Jamie Foxx
Good if you want to see: Planes, Trains, and Automobiles updated for the post-Hangover society we now live in.
Director: Tom McGrath, Cameron Hood, Kyle Jefferson
Starring: Will Ferrell, Brad Pitt, Tina Fey, Jonah Hill, David Cross
Good if you want to see: a reformed supervillain story told in DreamWorks Animation's signature not-bad-but-obviously-no-Pixar style.
Director: Danny Boyle
Starring: James Franco
Good if you want to see: an adventurous James Franco trapped under a rock, with excruciatingly gruesome yet Oscar-buzzed results.
For Colored Girls
Director: Tyler Perry
Starring: Janet Jackson, Whoopi Goldberg, Kimberly Elise, Loretta Devine, Thandie Newton, Anika Noni Rose, Kerry Washington, Tessa Thompson, Phylicia Rashad (where's S. Epatha Merkerson?)
Good if you want to see: Tyler Perry present an African-American melodrama that he, for once, didn't write, and therefore one that is not frequently interrupted by a hilarious drag character.
Director: Doug Liman
Starring: Naomi Watts, Sean Penn
Good if you want to see: a based-on-a-true-story political thriller that looks so much like a based-on-a-true-story political thriller that just typing the title filled my head with desaturated shots of the capitol.
Director: Christopher Morris
Starring: Rizwan Ahmed, Arsher Ali, Nigel Lindsay, Kayvan Novak
Good if you want to see: a satire about bumbling British jihadists planning a terrorist attack, written and directed by the guy who created Brass Eye and The Day Today (both of which are really good, if you didn't know).