Here's what comes out today, friends:
Just Go With It
Director: Dennis Dugan
Starring: Adam Sandler, Jennifer Aniston, Brooklyn Decker
Good if you want to see: Adam Sandler lying in order to be with one extremely attractive woman, but in the process falling in love with another, nearly-as-attractive woman that he's meant to be with.
Justin Bieber: Never Say Bieber
Director: Jon Chu
Starring: Justin Bieber & Friends
Good if you want to see: The Story of Bieber.
Gnomeo & Juliet
Director: Kelly Asbury
Starring: James McAvoy, Emily Blunt
Good if you want to see: Romeo and Juliet, but with gnomes, because then it's a pun.
Director: Kevin MacDonald
Starring: Channing Tatum, Jamie Bell
Good if you want to see: two of the 00s' premier male film dancers being Roman soldiers together.
Cedar Rapids (limited)
Director: Miguel Arteta
Starring: Ed Helms, John C. Reilly, Anne Heche, Senator Clay Davis
Good if you want to see: Ed Helms hungover in a hotel with an escort again, but with a little indie veneer.
Director: Chang-dong Lee
Starring: Jeong-hie Yun, David Lee,
Good if you want to see: an old woman, facing the onset of Alzheimer's, find empowerment through her poetry class. Is this community college propaganda or what?
Director: Pablo Trapero
Starring: Ricardo Darin, Martina Gusman
Good if you want to see: a sleazy personal injury attorney in a complicated romance with an idealistic country doctor. Or just wait for ABC to make a sitcom out of it.
In Her Skin (limited)
Director: Simone North
Starring: Guy Pearce, Miranda Otto, Sam Neill
Good if you want to see: the story behind a self-loathing babysitter murdering her young charge. And there's Sam Neill!
Vidal Sassoon: The Movie (limited)
Director: Craig Teper
Starring: Vidal Sassoon
Good if you want to see: Vidal Sassoon: The Movie.
Orgasm, Inc. (limited)
Director: Liz Canner
Good if you want to see: a documentary about the business and science of female sexual satisfaction. There's more to it than those KY Intense commercials, apparently.
Certifiably Jonathan (limited)
Director: Jim Pasternak
Starring: Jonathan Winters, Robin Williams, Jeffrey Tambor, Sarah Silverman
Good if you want to see: a documentary about comedian Jonathan Winters and his painting, because apparently he paints?