No One Really Wanted To See Any Barbarians, Vampire Neighbors, or Spying Children

August 22, 2011


Your lackluster weekend box office:

1. The Help - $20.5 million, dropping only 21% to claim the top spot after a second-place start. Now comes the Freddy Vs. Jason-style crossover where Emma Stone and The Blind Side's Sandra Bullock compete to be the more racially-sensitive pretty Southern lady.

2. Rise of the Planet of the Apes - $16.3 million, ceding the top spot but still, in its third week, beating all the new releases. If this popularity keeps up, soon star Andy Serkis won't be able to walk the streets in a spandex suit covered in motion-sensor balls.

3. Spy Kids: All the Time in the World - $12 million, a weak opening that probably has nothing at all to do with the film's accompanying scent of dirty baby diapers.

4. Conan the Barbarian - $10 million. Turns out you can't just dress up any muscular guy in a loin cloth and expect people to show up. At least not if you're also going to include Rose McGowan's forehead.

5. The Smurfs - $8 million. Ut oh, Fright Night, you just got Smurfed.

Weekend Box Office Results [Box Office Mojo]

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