Sneezing in 'Contagion' Probably Won't Even Be Worth Pulling Your Penis Out in the Theater and Masturbating To, and More...

September 2, 2011


Have a fine Labor Day weekend, everyone. But please, keep in mind:

- The sneeze fetishist community's reaction to all that hot, hot sniffling in Steven Soderbergh's Contagion? Surprisingly mixed, discovered Gawker, with one sneeze lover cynically predicting, "Knowing Hollywood, they will still find a way to cut all the sneezes out of this movie." Typical liberal Hollywood bias, never letting deviants get their dicks hard over some sneezes.

- Anna Kendrick will play a discontented goth who becomes her university's a capella group star in the romantic-comedy Pitch Perfect. Kat Dennings, Lizzy Caplan, and Aubrey Plaza really fell asleep at the wheel on this one.

- Sony has signed a first-look deal with Justin Lin, so if he has any new ideas for Vin Diesel to be fast and furious, they've got dibs, guys.

- Surprise: no one likes Madonna's new movie.

- Roman Coppola's belated follow-up to CQ will be a movie titled A Glimpse Inside the Mind of Charles Swan III. Now you know.

- Time to remake more things! Ed Helms is attached to star in a US version of Le Mac, a French comedy in which a mild-mannered banker is forced to go undercover as his twin brother, who's a powerful criminal pimp. Here's the trailer for the original. It's in French, but it also speaks in the international language of obvious musical cues, so you'll figure it out.

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