'Cosmopolis' Trailer: 'Twilight' Vampire Pees in Car, Shoots Hole in Hand, Cruises Past Sbarro

March 22, 2012


The first trailer for David Cronenberg's Cosmopolis is here, and it is not safe for work nor safe for those Twilight fans hoping to keep an idealized vision of Robert Pattinson preserved in their mind as well as their flesh. In this nerve-wracking preview for the Don DeLillo novel adaptation, Pattinson has unsettling sex with non-Bellas, pisses in a limousine, nonchalantly shoots a hole through his hand, and begs a naked woman to do the same to his anemic chest. The trailer is also NSFSbarro, in that I can't imagine the shot of a giant rat eyeing the pizza chain could possibly be good for business. Let's hope this doesn't shake up their reputation as Best, Most Authentic New York Pizza (of All Time Since Forever, Mmmmm!).

Hey, Dave looks fun to hang out with again, now that he's finally dumped his boring boyfriend Viggo!

(Thanks, KidBraggart.)

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