'Tall Man' Trailer: Jessica Biel Versus the Gangling Pedophile

July 2, 2012


As the trailer for The Tall Man opens, a small girl is giving Jessica Biel, and us, a little history lesson on her small town of Cold Rock. It's been "dead" for six years, she says, and while many residents initially attributed the closing of a local mine for the lull in activity, other, keener minds have since started to blame the fact that Cold Rock's children are constantly being abducted by the looming villain from I Know What You Did Last Summer. The local sheriff lazily confirms the story, but a skeptical, grounded Jessica Biel does not believe in things like tall, shadowy figures, serial kidnappings, or statistics gathered from confirmed police reports. She'll believe it when she sees it! And so she does, as the film's leggy antagonist does not wait long to smack Biel around and sneak away with her curly-haired moppet, thus establishing that maybe it is a bad idea to raise a kid in a dying mining town/proud child-abduction capital.

WHO IS IT??? Stephen McHattie's FBI guy? Jessica Biel's schizophrenic, stilt-wearing alter-ego? Just a tall piece of poster board that reads, "It's a half-assed metaphor for meth both literally and figuratively stealing away the lives of children in mining towns"?


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