Absolutely No One Will Help Natalie Portman with 'Jane Got a Gun'

May 2, 2013

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Bradley Cooper has become yet another damning portent that Natalie Portman will never, ever get a gun. Deadline reports he's the latest in a long string of participants to drop out of Jane Got a Gun, the Western drama Portman is futilely still trying to produce and star in despite every sign that she should just give it up.

We Need To Talk About Kevin director Lynne Ramsay was originally set to direct the film, with Portman, Michael Fassbender, and Joel Edgerton starring. Shortly before their production start, Fassbender dropped out, Edgerton was like, "Cool, could I be that guy then?", and Portman said fine, then called Jude Law with a, "Natalie... from Cold Mountain? So I've got a favor..." Law picked up Edgerton's leavings, but on the first day of shooting, Ramsay, weirdly, just didn't show up, forcing Edgerton to call up director Gavin O'Connor to say, "Joel... from Warrior? So I've got a favor..." O'Connor agreed to take over, but then Jude Law decided he didn't want to be in this either, and Cooper became the latest actor in rotation for the oft-departed role. He's apparently since caught on to how fucked this is, and despite committing to the part, he's now like, "Oh, shit, I just remembered! I have this... other thing!" Or, possibly, the Boston bombings delayed shooting on American Hustle, and Cooper said in a statement:

"Regretfully, due to date conflicts between the film I am currently shooting for David O Russell and Jane Got A Gun, I am unable to join Natalie, Joel, Noah and Gavin on this truly exciting project. I was really looking forward to being a part of it and hope to work with each and every one in the future."

With Portman still steadfast in getting more notable young actors to drop out of this before calling it off, Jake Gyllenhaal, Tobey Maguire, Tom Hiddleston, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt are said to be the latest hearing, "Natalie... from Brothers/Thor/Hesher? So..."

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