Casting Things: LaBeouf's a Brother, Peña's Drunk, Billy Crystal's Having Sex with His Peers Because That's Funny

May 14, 2013

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- At last we'll get to watch Billy Crystal fuck some retirees. He'll reportedly star in Winter's Discontent, a comedy with a pretty lofty title for being about "a widower who moves into a reputed, active mature community in an attempt to reinvigorate his sex life." Frank Oz is directing and--oh no, Billy, that was your erectile medication you just downed three of, and the community meeting is in five minutes! UH-GULK!

- Shia LaBeouf is attached to star in Villain, a psychological thriller from 28 Weeks Later director Juan Carlos Fresnadillo. He'll play the younger of two brothers who "mysteriously re-connect in an unforgiving wilderness," where they're like, "Hey, you still working over at, uh... what's the place? Yeah. You still there? That's cool. We're dying of dehydration."

- Elsewhere in the world of LaBeouf, he and Brad Pitt will now be joined by Michael Peña in End of Watch director David Ayer's WWII tank film, Fury. Peña will reportedly play the tank's driver, a butcher who's perpetually drunk. It's fine, though. The '40s were a different time for getting hammered and driving a tank.

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