See the Astounding Taylor Lautner 'Stretch Armstrong' That Could Have Been

November 14, 2013


It was just last month that Relativity Media gave up on making a Stretch Armstrong movie, but if you look back another year or two, you'll find that this was not the first time someone lost interest in that idea. Universal, too, was once developing the property, and even got so far as to aptly cast Taylor Lautner as the goo-filled titular humanoid. They also apparently got far enough to storyboard out a whole sequence into an animatic, and now, thanks to Film Sketchr (via), you can have a look at it and get a feel for what a strange thing that would have been. It rocks.

Things we can ascertain from this brief window into a Lautner future that never happened:

- This Lucas guy was really cool. Totally.

- The film was going to be surprisingly graphic when it came to limb loss.

- Our hero wasn't going to be the only one with powers: a lady could run fast, Chris Jenning could heal himself, and there's the guy whose power was.... green wires and the ability to pull up Lautner's promotional headshots?

- Lucas Armstrong could not be stabbed to death; this seems to go against the toy's canon, as I can tell you with certainty that stabbing a Stretch Armstrong to see what's inside definitely ruins it, and then the kid that owns it gets mad.

- Lucas Armstrong was really going to go out of his way to establish that Stretch Armstrong was a toy, and that he was that toy, in case you hadn't picked up on that.

- Lucas Armstrong must have found the only office in existence still getting its water cooler refills in glass bottles.

- Someone should definitely make this movie.

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