Kevin Smith, Johnny Depp Making Movie About Canadian Yoga Teens, Nepotism

August 19, 2014


Kevin Smith and Johnny Depp are teaming up for Yoga Hosers, the film that is the thin rubber mat their daughters will stretch out into acting upon. According to THR, Smith is calling the film his take on a comic book movie, adding, "but instead of yet another dude saving the day, our antiheroes are the most feared and formidable creatures man has ever encountered: two fifteen-year-old girls."

Those fifteen-year-old girls? Their respectively floral and Batman-inspired progeny, Lily-Rose Depp and Harley Quinn Smith.

The two will play girls both named Colleen, Manitoban yoga fanatics who are also convenience store clerks--just so we have something even more familiarly Smith-y than his genes. "When an ancient evil rises from beneath Canada's crust and threatens their big invitation to a Grade 12 party," it's explained, "the Colleens join forces with a legendary man-hunter from Montreal named Guy Lapointe (Depp) to fight for their lives with, according to the producers, 'all seven Chakras, one Warrior Pose at a time.'" Kevin Smith and Johnny Depp have apparently decided to be the only dads on Earth actively encouraging us to watch their teenage daughters do yoga.

The entire cast of Smith's latest, Tusk--including Michael Parks, Justin Long, Haley Joel Osment, and Genesis Rodriguez--is coming back for this one, and Smith is adding to that Tony Hale, Natasha Lyonne, Austin Butler, Adam Brody, Tyler Posey, and Jason Mewes. Deals are already in place for foreign and domestic distribution, and with a script already in-hand, is said to already be starting this week. The only thing that could go wrong now? This all relies on Kevin Smith following through on a yoga plan.

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