Spoiling everyone's chance to turn the Batman v Superman trailer into a romantic night out, Warner Bros. has gone ahead and released the preview online ahead of its IMAX premiere Monday night. Compared to the leaked version that preceded it, there's a lot more to take in here.
The trailer opens to an audio collage of people questioning whether or not we, mankind, should place our lives in the hands of Henry Cavill's handsome Mork. Can an alien with such power truly be trusted not to abuse it? And if he can be trusted to defend us, is that going to involve leveling an entire city again? Because come on, man. Not everyone has renters insurance.
Next: the first shot of our new Bruce Wayne. It is, unmistakably, the prick from Mallrats. He appears extremely pissy. It seems that the costume chafing alone was not what was making Batman look so irritated in his press photo. Over the image of Affleck's scowl, Jeremy Irons imparts some sage wisdom. Like Alfie Alfred, Dead Ringers Alfred really knows how to make a dramatic monologue sound important, even when it's coming out of the mouth of an elderly manservant. The Downton Abbey cast should take note.
Batman, now costumed, stands in an abandoned building, a hole in the roof allowing the rain to pour over him. He stares up at it, no doubt pondering, "Should I move over a little, to get out of the rain?" He does not, because it looks pretty cool as is, especially with the shafts of light likewise pouring over him. "This is a nice visual metaphor for Zack Snyder's style-over-substance versus Nolan's pragmatic utilitarianism," Batman thinks, lowering his damp head.
Then, what is presumably Batman's new Batwing starts just gunning the fuck out of some dudes. This Batman is apparently a bit more free and loose with his views on guns and murder. Not everything has changed, though. The guy still loves to stand atop skyscrapers looking pensive and dramatic.
Finally, we get what was promised to us in the title (besides justice dawning): Batman, now clad in an armored suit equipped with spooky voice modulator, facing off against Superman.
"Do you bleed?" Batman asks. "You will."
You can already imagine how the two will look back and laugh at this once they're Super Friends.
And here are the new posters, featuring the legendary Batman/Superman subway ad defacement battle.