Over 20 years out from Jurassic Park and it's a question you still hear: "Why do the dinosaurs in Spielberg's original still look better than much of the CGI we see today--and also why did we not strap lasers on those dinosaurs and ride them?" Well, everyone can stop worrying about the latter part now, because Solipsist Film and Mattel are going to take care of it. According to The Tracking Board, the companies are teaming up for a particularly esoteric nostalgia grab in an adaptation of the late '80s toy/cartoon series Dino-Riders.
As the name implies, Dino-Riders was about a bunch of people riding around on dinosaurs, which they used as the laser-covered war mounts in their battles. The good guys, the Valorians, were a human-like race of dino-whisperers who used their psychic technology to befriend the dinosaurs, convincing them to be ridden around like living tanks. The evil, gross-looking Rulons, meanwhile, used brain control devices to cruelly dominate the dinosaurs. While you'd hope this contrast in philosophy might finally open up a frank, open dialogue about dinosaur domestication, instead everyone just strapped some cool weapons on their dinosaurs and fought. Honestly, it was pretty awesome.
A studio is not yet attached to the project, and it's said producers are first looking for "the right scribe to give their take on the concept." Too few writers understand that the wasp-headed man guiding the mind-controlled ankylosaurus with a giant crossbow on its back was a METAPHOR.