February 14, 2006

Leo Puts on Teddy

leoroosevelt.jpgFirst it was Howard Hughes, now it's Theodore Roosevelt. An informant, whose mother works as a curator for the Theodore Roosevelt birthplace, claims Martin Scorsese will be directing a film titled The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt, with Leonardo DiCaprio taking on the title role.

As good an actor as DiCaprio may be, he seems an odd choice for the role. Martin Scorsese just seems to have a love affair with this guy. I have the feeling that, given enough time, Scorsese would cast DiCaprio as literally every person in history. A hairy, Cro-Magnon Leo will create fire, then beat a more primitive, less evolved Leo with a bone. Pharaoh Leo will whip slave Leo, screaming for him to built pyramids, then free the Hebrew Leos at the urging of Moses Leo. Eli Whitney Leo invents the cotton gin, Hitler Leo runs rampant through Europe, and Harry S. Truman Leo, desperate to end the war, bombs Japan, killing many Japanese Leos. Einstein Leo regrets his contributions to the program. You get the idea. Everyone is played by DiCaprio. Except Robert DeNiro, who plays himself.

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Previous Entries

The Break-Up Trailer

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Ah, Moviefone. What you lack in spelling correctness you more than make up for in trailer exclusives. Go watch the trailer for The Break-Up there, starring Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston. It's Aniston's "Oh no you didn't" to Brad Pitt's Mr. and Mrs. Smith, "Yeah, I did that." Except this comes after that, so maybe it's more of a, "Yeah, I did that too, but not with one of the most beautiful people in the world. It's just Vince Vaughn. He's kind of tall."

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Murphy is a Starship

murphystarship.jpgEddie Murphy has signed on to star in Peter Segal's Starship Dave. The story involves a group of small aliens looking to save their doomed planet, leading to their use of Dave (Murphy) as a starship. I'm quite excited for Eddie Murphy's return to the genre he first nailed with Adventures of Pluto Nash: science fiction for incredibly stoned college kids.

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Kutch Keeps Making Shows

kutchaol.jpgIn a deal with Time Warner, Ashton Kutcher's production company Katalyst Films, creators of Punk'd, will make a short-form series for AOL.com and AOL Instant Messenger service. Katalyst co-owner Jason Goldberg said of the show:

The programming is going to have a serious attitude behind it. There might be hurt feelings.

I think it's probably going to be most insulting to absolutely anyone who ever tried to get a show created, ever, and now must know that Ashton Kutcher is even further ahead of them. The having "serious attitude" claim doesn't impress me at all, either. Fruit Roll-Ups said the same thing a few years back, and all they did was add some colors and shapes you could rip out.

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More Batman Casting

watsonbatman.jpgSeveral new rumors have popped-up about casting in the next Batman film. First, Brad Dourif, who played Grima Wormtongue in Lord of the Rings, may be up for the role of Dr. Arkham. Bob Hoskins, too, may have landed a part as Italian mobster Salvatore Maroni, presumably because all Italian mobsters are fat, little, bald men, and you can't have Danny DeVito in every Batman. Finally, Dr. Harleen Quinzel, the scientist who becomes The Joker's sidekick Harley Quinn, is rumored for Emily Watson. Emily Watson? Isn't Harley Quinn supposed to be a young, sassy, little cutie? I like Emily Watson, but not for this role. Is there a villain known for being kind of quiet and homely?

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Talladega Nights Trailer

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The trailer for Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby is now up on Sony's site. It's another collaboration between Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, the same creative team of Anchorman, so you'd think it should be pretty good, but the trailer didn't really sell me. Hopefully, the actual movie will be funnier, because frankly, it needs to be funny. The day NASCAR stops being funny is the day the rednecks have won. The day they've finally completed their exhaustive agenda... The day they got-r-done.

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